Emergency Pants

Episode 111: And a-one and a-two and a-three and PANTS and step and step and FOSSE and JAZZ HANDS!

• We crack ourselves up
• Bridget tells the Dyson guy to take the goddamn marbles out of his mouth when he talks
• We create a system for dealing with stupidity
• Steak.
• We love Richard Cheese, and we bet you will, too! Go buy his music!
• Thanks to Cheryl for sending us links to some retro Wendy’s training videos! Check them out here and here

Download: Episode 111

Episode 110: NO TRIPODS OR WATER ON THE BRIDGE!

• Bridget had some visitors! Check it out!
• Shane got one of these! You can get one here.
• Bridget is in love with Angus Oblong. For reals.
• She also likes Chris Uminga and PEEP.

Today’s cover art was drawn by the talented Angus Oblong. The one that Bridget loves. Tenderly and deeply. Go to his site and buy stuff!

Download: Episode 110

Episode 109: THIS IS EMERGENCY TROUSERS PEOPLE! This episode contains 100% more Jamie – IN BRIDGET’S HOUSE!

I’ll be honest. I don’t have any notes. Sorry. Go listen to this slowed down Justin Bieber song and maybe it will help.

Download: Episode 109

Episode 108: You can keep your blank in here!

We’re both kinda punchy and needy this week. I dunno what we talked about, except:

• Marshall is hilarious and awesome.
• Hi to Robyn Enz and our biggest lil’ fan, Alyssa

Download: Episode 108

Episode 107: Ain’t no thang.

• We got a voice mail from Marshall, who also makes cool videos! Thanks Marshall!
• We know you’ve seen double rainbow, but hey, it’s worth another look.
• Antoine Dodson and the remix
• We discuss the Aciphex effect, including:
• Penis pens. For reals.
• Penis mouse. For reals.

Download: Episode 107

Episode 106: IT’S A KELLY AND JOE SHOW!

• Happy Birthday, Shane!
• Shane went to DC and met some of our awesome listeners
• We got the best email in the world
• Listener and kindred spirit Marshall took Furby pictures
• That fucking What Would You Do TV show
• Kelly recommends The Legend of Neil
• There was a lot of other stuff, but I was laughing too hard and I forgot it.

Download: Episode 106

Episode 105: Hooooooooly SHIT!

• Wait, Wait – Don’t Tell Me is a fun podcast
• Obsessed with Obsessed
• Drunk Link
• Bridget’s internet is cuter than your internet.
• There’s two Shoedini commercials, with Gilbert Gottfried or without Gilbert Gottfried
• Bridget worked for The Swiss Colony once – not the Amana Colonies
• Check out Bad Movie Bingo
• Navy Pier is touristy. Have some fudge!

Download: Episode 105

Episode 104: In which we ALMOST had RJ from A Cup of Fresh Hell as a co-host, but Skype was being a bitch, so alas, not this time. *hangs head* Anyway, we talked about a lot of crap. Mostly farts. Sorry. Here’s a whole bunch of fun videos to make up for it:

• Panda Cheese
• A Slab or Slice or Chunka
• Don’t Drown Your Food
• Ahahahahahahahaha, thingie!
• Farts. Don’t try to hide ‘em.

Download: Episode 104

Episode 103: I dunno.
• Joe sent Shane a pressie! Thanks, Joe!
• Harry Potter
• The Surprised Puppy Face pictures came rolling in!
• Death by pussitivity
• Death by email from Merlin Mann
• Hammocks will steal your lady if you aren’t careful
• Look, a fancy art show featuring Bridget, Jamie, and VSC!
• Bridget met the awesome Sarah Moore from Craft Critique
• Fart training
• We end with a special song for Penny

Download: Episode 103

Episode 102 has negatively effected our lives in the following ways:

• We say air hair lair to Clair and David
• We discuss Shane’s bed
• Shout out to RJ and Chris at Cup of Fresh Hell
• Shae is reading bad books
• Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows is awesome
• Bridget and the security guard at work
• Use the Bureau of Communication for all of your apology needs
• Ruby42‘s cross stitch is purchased by Kat Von D and we worry that it might need an intervention

Download: Episode 102

KAT VON D CALL ME!

Episode 101: See my loafers? Former gophers.

• We make bad fashion choices, like Shane’s ball shorts discussed in this episode
• We have high expectations
• We didn’t talk about them, but LOOK AT THESE ADORABLE ANIMALS! I SAID LOOK AT THEM!
• Hey, be a dear and comment and like this video so a friend of ours can win an iPad. Puhlease?
• Today’s cover art is shamelessly pinched from Natalie Dee, who is awesome.
• Bridget’s other podcast, Stitching n Junk, released its 3rd episode today!

Download: Episode 101

Episode 100: Holy crap, it’s episode 100!!!

• Williard Scott is nuts
• Bill Kurtis is awesome!
• James Earl Jones has that voice when he does every day stuff, too, you know.
• Needs to be developed: Emergency Pants drinking game. Additional: Stitching N Junk drinking game. Discuss.
• America’s Next Top Bridget’s Mom is… *drum roll* RJ from Cup of Fresh Hell podcast! YAY!
• Lookin’ at Shane’s head.
• Dreams and the problems they cause
• Father Flanagan – kind of a douche.
• Bridget’s coming out

Download: Episode 100

Episode 99:

• Shane’s got a bed! A new one, we mean.
• We like Cyanide and Happiness!
• The high fructose corn syrup people think we’re stupid. JERKS!
• The Face Trainer is ridiculous. Watch the third video down. TRUST ME. Then, go add a photo of yourself making silly faces to this flickr group! Please?
• Will YOU be America’s Next Top Bridget’s Mom?
• Penny is doing awesome self portraits!

Download: Episode 99

Episode 98: We’re sorry and junk!

Oh my god, you guys! We have guests! KELLY AND JOE! Oh, and their kid. Steve. Sam. Shawn. SETH. ANYWAY. Tonight we discussed:

• Cheese Nips
• Balls
• Poop
• Steak
• Steak
• Small amount of peas
• Air conditioning
• Bridget’s Mom

Download: Episode 98

Episode 97: Oh die schone, oh die schone, oh die schone SCHNITZELBANK!

• Rose sent is this link all about funny signs
• This place makes funky chocolates
• Bascom Hogue is awesome, as is Alissa
• Golden Girls vs. Golden Shower Girls
• We miss you, Grits to Glitz!
• Kung Pow: Enter the Fist and What’s Up, Tiger Lily? are hilarious
• Purple Rose of Cairo turns Bridget into a dumb girl

Episode 97